We all want to be the best versions of ourselves. However, what often gets in the way of people striving for more is their beliefs. Our beliefs about ourselves, others, what’s possible, etc., influence our behavior. If our beliefs are negative, this can often cause us to limit ourselves, thereby leaving us feeling stuck and unfulfilled. But, we can choose not to let limiting beliefs hold us back. We can free ourselves of the negative stories holding us back and courageously live life being who we are meant to be.
WHAT ARE LIMITING BELIEFS
Limiting beliefs are our negative thoughts or the stories we tell ourselves that keep us from realizing our full potential. For example, when was the last time you had thoughts like “I’m not smart enough.” I’m not good at relationships.” “I don’t have enough time.” “I wish I had more money.” Everyone has thoughts like these all the time. The problem is that they are limiting, and they keep us from stepping outside of our comfort zone.
WHERE DO LIMITING BELIEFS COME FROM
At a young age, we are surrounded by people and experiences that gradually shape our beliefs about every area of our lives. Limiting beliefs come from several sources. In his new book Built Through Courage, Dave Hollis talks about some sources of limiting beliefs and how they can negatively affect our quality of life.
“Leaving what you know for what you need is scary; there is comfort in the familiar, even if it’s not serving you. We cling to the stories we’ve been told about who we are and what our lives should be. We feel safe inhabiting the limiting roles that we’ve inherited from our families, from society, and our past. The trouble is these preordained roles are often holding us back from where we want to go and who we are here to be.”
HOW TO OVERCOME LIMITING BELIEFS
Overcoming limiting beliefs is a process that takes time. Deciding to let go of thoughts and stories that have been a part of you for a long time is not an easy or quick process. Built Through Courage also talks about some of the challenges one might face when overcoming limiting beliefs.
“The decision to leave your safe harbor and pursue your dream will require that you make some uncomfortable moves. You are going to have to face your uncertainty and push past your fear. You have to have the courage to manufacture opportunities when other people try to tell you what you can’t do.”
Here are some steps you can take to start overcoming your limiting beliefs and living a happier, healthier more fulfilled life.
IDENTIFY YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS
The first step in getting rid of your limiting stories is to become aware of what they are. What are some of the negative thoughts that are holding you back from going after what you want? When was the last time someone told you that you couldn’t do something? When has someone’s opinion kept you from trying something new?
FIGURE OUT THE SOURCE OF THE STORIES
As I mentioned earlier, limiting beliefs come from multiple sources. Who told you what you couldn’t do? Who told you a negative story about an experience? Finding the source of the negative beliefs will allow you to reevaluate the validity of the source. If you find that the source of the story was misguided, then change your negative beliefs to positive, more empowering ones.
TEST YOUR BELIEFS
When people tell you what you can’t do, even the people closest to you, challenge their opinions and try anyway. You overcome your limiting beliefs by pushing your limits. If your convictions are stronger than those who tell you what won’t work, you will feel inclined to do it anyway. Before you take anyone’s word as absolute, try the experience out for yourself. No two people are the same. We all experience and interpret events differently. Let your beliefs be from your own experience and not a reflection of others. Dave Hollis beautifully summarizes this point in Built Through Courage stating,
“The only way to become not just who you want to be, but who you need to be is by rejecting the limitations handed down to you by society, your family of origin, your experiences, or your expectations.”
LOOK FOR EVIDENCE
Challenge your limiting beliefs by looking for evidence that contradicts your negative beliefs. Every belief or thought that’s out there has some evidence that can disprove it. For example, I used to say, “I don’t have time.” Everyone says this. Then, through reading books and learning from others who have mastered the art of productivity, I became aware of how much time I’ve always had. As a result, I’m more cautious about what I’m spending my time doing and intentionally take time to set clear priorities.
FINAL THOUGHTS
We all struggle with limiting beliefs. Those who know how to identify them and take action to overcome them are the ones that live life to the fullest. The sooner you overcome your limiting beliefs, the sooner you will feel free to live the life you’ve always wanted and show up as the person you are meant to be.
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